The beautiful girl I mentor and her motherThe Chronicle-Tribune published a short piece I wrote as a guest columnist in yesterday's paper!
http://www.chronicle-tribune.com/articles/2008/08/18/opinion/editorials/doc48a8a1f275d0b539173310.txt
We are who we are shaped to be.
I think that deep down I’ve known this for a while, but it’s really become apparent in the last few years. I am who I am today largely because of the experiences I’ve had, the books I’ve read, and the people I’ve encountered and built relationships with. It’s like the song from Wicked that says, “People come into our life for a reason…So much of me is made of what I learned from you.”
My dad. My mom. My Grandma Ellie and Grandpa Blaine. Our youth director. My professors. My college roommates. Relationships. I mean, basically, all of what really matters in life comes down to relationships. Our connections. Our networks.
I have had such great people in my life. I really have. No, I don’t come from some perfect family. No, I haven’t had some plush, care-free, easy life. But I have had awesome relationships.
You know, I feel like there’s been a lot of turnover in relationships in my life. And I think sometime’s it’s easy to believe that we have to be in someone’s life for a really long time in order to make a real difference. And certainly, it is true that those long-term relationships are crucial. Why else would so many people honor their mom, dad, and grandparents for their dedicated commitment to them and their love throughout the years?
Strong, positive, long-term relationships are vital to the success and development of children and teenagers. But let’s not discredit the influence of shorter-term relationships that have made a big difference in our lives. We learn a lot from people who step into our lives for a season.
Often these people come into our lives as teachers, friends, mentors. We can learn a lot from these people. And mentors often aren’t official. So much of our learning is life-on-life. Often our greatest cheerleaders and guides are simply the people who have chosen to take us under their wings for a while.
I was talking to a high school mentor of mine once after a friend died. My mentor Jonese told me that we are not comforted so that we can be comfortable. We are comforted so that we may in turn comfort others. He taught me that the same was true of blessings. We are not blessed just so we can lead some happy, carefree, blessing-full lives. We are blessed so that we, in turn, may bless others. Blessed to bless. This is totally biblical, and it’s become one of my main philosophies in life.
I’m trying to be faithful to pass on the blessing of relationship. So I’ve been in some good healthy unofficially mentoring relationships, and this fall I took the step to be an “official” mentor with Project Leadership. I meet with this really beautiful, great freshman girl once a week for lunch. I’m just there for her in this season of her life to be an extra encourager, cheerleader, friend, and guide. And I’ll you the truth, I have as much fun and learn as much as my mentee. It is a highlight.
We are all role models. Someone somewhere is looking up to us. What kind of role models will we be? We can also all step up in some area of our life to be a role model and mentor another. And we can all choose to seek out mentoring relationships where we can learn and grow.
I challenge you to take an hour or two this week, and schedule time to make a focused impact on a child. Maybe you could lend a hand in your child’s classroom. Maybe you’d like to mentor a youth through the Boys & Girls Club, through Project Leadership, or through the Kids Hope program. Maybe there’s a new teacher at your school or a young mom or dad at your church who could use a cheerleader and guide.
How will you choose to intentionally build into someone’s life this week?
We need each other to grow. We need each other today.
